Hi everyone. This post is going to be long (because this finale WAS THREE HOURS) and it’s also pretty late (because I still have a day job and not actually a Ph.D.) Make a snack, […]
Category: Nick
Episode 11: The Women Tell Uggggggghhhhh
It’s Bachelor tradition to have an episode dedicated to the show’s beloved rejects, kooky castoffs, and sworn blood enemies. The tell-all special usually acts as a last minute audition reel for Bachelor in Paradise, so […]
Episode 10: Fantasy Yurts
If you’ll recall, last week’s episode ended with Raven telling Nick that she was in love with him and had never climaxed during sex. After nervously adjusting his turtleneck, Nick decided to roll with it […]
Episode 9: WTF
Confession time, everybody. This might come as a shock, especially considering I have a fake Ph.D in this subject, but I have not actually been watching The Bachelor for that many years. My trash TV […]
Episode 8: Hometown Horrors
In the aftermath of Kristina being sent home, the women are in turmoil. Corinne has completely unraveled, her extensions shriveled from the saltwater and her mind poisoned by Nick’s treachery. Will there be a rose […]
Episode 7: The Longest Episode Ever
Full disclosure: I was baking banana bread and missed the first ten minutes of this episode. From what I could gather: Nick cries on a patio Nick cries on a beach Chris Harrison talks some […]
Episode 6: Misery in Paradise
Remember last week’s wild two-on-one? When Corinne and Taylor “took their fight to the swamp”? Sadly, that storyline is still happening. Taylor marches into the abandoned church where Nick and Corinne are drinking wine and staring […]
Episode 5: A Stank Face on Your Face
We’re still in Waukesha, where much like the contestants, the temperatures are barely out of the teens. Taylor and Corinne continue their argument from last week, because nothing says maturity like repeatedly calling each other […]
Episode 4: Fast Times in Milwaukee
We pick up where our last episode left off – Vanessa just watched Nick and Corinne dry hump in a bouncy castle, and she is NOT. HAVING. IT. Nick gets where Vanessa is coming from […]
Episode 3: Backstreet’s Gotta Get Paid
Contrary to the mascara-tear streaked previews for this episode, the girls take the news of Nick and Elizabeth Liz’s prior fling in stride. It’s like they weren’t that surprised that a nearly 40 year old […]