Like Neil Lane, Reality TV Ph.D has once again risen from the grave to recap Colton’s quest for love. Give a belated Nobel Prize to whatever engineering genius figured out how to make DVR a […]
Tag: sports ruin lives
The Men Yell All
The Tell All episodes are brazenly useless filler episodes, but Chris Harrison has kids to put through college so here we are. With no linear storyline to recap, here’s some RANDOM JUDGING: WORST DRESSED Initially […]
So Much Conch
It’s Week 7 of the Bachelorette, and Becca and her remaining husbands are in the Bahamas. Weeks 5 and 6 were typical of the mid season Bachelor franchise slump (bleak and terribly stupid) and work […]
Two Ambulances in One Episode
Before we get into all of the stupid action of Week 3, can we discuss HOW HAUNTED THE BACHELOR MANSION IS? From the exterior, the mansion appears to be spacious and well tended. But if […]
TRAAAAAASH
Week 2 kicks off with a group date card arriving for Clay, Chris R (side note: why the R? Does Christon also go by Chris, or is there another generic dude here I missed?) David […]
Bachelor Winter Games: Winter of Our Discontent
The finish line is in sight for Winter Games – the grand finale is Thursday, followed by Arie’s finale on Monday. Oh, and a Women Tell All special Sunday night. THIS IS ENTIRELY TOO MUCH […]
Bachelor Winter Games: Au Revoir, Benoit
Chris Harrison and his dark acolytes at ABC are trying to kill us all with 6 hours a week of Bachelor action. I’m drawn to Winter Games like a raccoon to a dumpster behind a […]
Episode 5: The Big Luyendowski
I missed the first 10 minutes or so trying to open a bottle of wine with a difficult cork, so sorryboutsies. Let’s see, Maquel comes back and everyone is like “omg how was your grandpa’s […]
Episode 3: Oh my GLOB
It’s only Week 3, and one of the Laurens says she’s “emotionally and physically drained”. Chris Harrison’s ears perk up at the sound of human suffering, so he apparates into the mansion to drop off […]
Episode 2: Guess Who’s Coming to Basketball
It’s a new day in the Bachelor mansion, and the husbands are ready to spend some more time with Rachel. But first, they’re in for some SHOCKING REVELATIONS. THE HUSBAND GAMES Kenny, Blake E, Whablucas, Fred, Dean, […]